I don’t know if this applies to boys as well as it does to girls but do you know that stage you go through when you start ‘blossoming’, when you’ve had sex for the first time or been asked out on your first date and you begin to realise that people find you attractive? I call it the explosion. Girls become a mix of confident, sexier, more selfish and spend most days smiling to themselves and their mobile phones and then changing their mind every ten seconds about whether or not someone likes them and why it took them five minutes to write back to a text instead of three. It all mixes in with one of the greatest lies young women ever tell, myself included; ‘I don’t know how to flirt, I never mean to but apparently I just do it!’ Hm, nice try.
Admittedly we might not recognise it immediately but we know something is going on and then when we begin to connect the dots we pretend we still don’t know we’re doing it, it’s the same as a defense of lack of intent. I know like this sounds like me trying to imply that I am wiser and brimming with lessons to teach unsuspecting fifteen year olds but that is definitely not the case. I’m still pretty naïve about it all, hence when every time I hook up with someone there’s an element of bewilderment that they actually had been trying to pick me up. I’ve slept with some guys that I spent my entire adolescence reminding myself I never had a chance with, it’s all just growing up I guess.
But back to flirting. It’s pretty great, really. Especially when you come across a good flirt. When you spend initial interactions trying to prove that you’re the wittiest person alive and that slowly trails off into standard, ‘How was your day?’ type interactions – then you decide, figure out if it’s a fizzle or an ‘I like you’ and that’s why you tell them all your boring news. One of my friends gets to enjoy most of my text messages and his usual responses alternative between, ‘Oh [insert my name here], oh no, really? Who is this guy?’ and, ‘You’re in’. I hate to sound immature but it’s where I get my best giggles.
Flirting also keeps you distracted from the terrifying reality of having to actually do something about your feelings. It’s all fun and games until you have to do something about it and that person on the other end of all those text messages is suddenly real and equipped with feelings. Who can’t remember that moment when someone takes it too far and you get the, ‘Look, sorry to sound like a dick but I’m not really looking for anything right now/let’s just keep it at friends, yeah?’.
Anyway, I better leave it there, this guy took 7 minutes to write back and the 15 I had to wait as a result is nearly over.